Hyper-In-Active

Sum Ergo Sum

Tag Archives: koan

Let’s Not Talk About This

As long as there is thoughts as words
There is no way out of reality as a concept
As long as there is no thoughts as words
There is only reality

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I Do Not Desire

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I do not desire
It is desiring
Desire arise within It

There is no one separate from It
No one able to control It
From the outside

I do not resist desire
It is resisting
Resistance arise within It

I do not act on desire
It is acting
Action arise within It

There is no one separate from It
No one able to control It
From the outside

It is All-a- Happening, without Me
It is All-a- Happening, within Me

My Understanding of MU

Who should practice the MU-koan?
No

What’s the purpous with MU?
No

How can you understand it?
No

Seems rather ridiculous, right?
No

Why has it been around for so long?
No

Is every answer a negative?
No

So what’s an affirmative answer?
No

Is the point to bore you with your own questions?
No

Is MU representing The All?
No

What can possibly come out of this?
No

So “No” is all what it is?
No

Dang it, I’ll go back to counting breath!
No

Whaddya mean “No”?
No

Hey, I’m talking to you…
No

This is just my thoughts
No

I’m tired
No

Ah, I see. When…
No

Wait a minute
No

This is so cool
No

I say “No” to everything!
No

I say “No” to every-THING
No

I should stop this, right?
No

But if “No” is all I get..
No

…then I know the rest of this
No

So I should just keep at it?
No

OK, so I’ll quit right here?
No

This if freakin’ useless
No

This gives no insight whatsoever
No

Luckily, there’s only five minutes left ’til the gong
No

Whaddya mean “No”, it is!
No

Shut Up!!!
No

You just won’t cave will you?
No

You’ll always be here?
No

Two minutes left…
No

YES IT IS!
No

?
No

You wait and see
No

I’ll just relax for now
No

Oh yes, I’ll abide in…
No

So it’s impossible for me to relax?
No

Aha, I must let go of trying to relax
No

I gotta let go!
No

You are so wierd
No

When is that bloody gong?
No

GONNNNGGGGGG

Yessss!
No

You can’t fool me to go on with this
No

That’s right, I win
No

________________________________________

Ok, so that’s how I see it. No matter what I come up with, the response is the same. It’s reliable and solid as a rock. It tells me that there’s no “I” to make up all those questions and in the end “I” will understand that and the real I will shut up. It’s also “No” to all of concepts, rationalizing, analysing and effort to “understand”.
I’ll just sit with it and that will arise in me.

-How about that Joshu?

-No

What is “All This” ?

I’m not sure what to meditate on. A word that constantly shows up in talks and texts about buddhism is ” s i m p l i c t y “. That’s excellent. I want simplicity. A good place to start would be to simply meditate. Easier said than done if you ask me. There is a vast array of meditations to choose from.

– Count your breathing
– Focus on compassion
– Be mindful of whatever comes to mind
– Acknowledge all bodily sensations
– Follow your breath as it travels through your body
– Plant your focus four fingers below your bellybutton
– And so on

Everyone of them is of course essential according to whoever wrote about it. One thing is for sure. Trying to do all of them will further confusion. If I keep on wobbling I can declare myself the new Confusious. So what technique to start with?
I dunno!
I must choose without knowing.
Shit, that’s hard.
I have some difficulty just counting breaths because it bores me to hell and back. I can make it easier by raising the bar a bit. Instead of counting 1-10 on breathing in (or out), I can make up a trickier sequence like
1-2-1-2-3-1-2-3-4-1-2-3-4-5…10-9-10-9-8-10-9-8-7… etc
that keeps my mind from wandering since I’ll have to store the “turning number” while keeping count. If I only do simple sequence there’s room for a lot of divergent thought between numbers. And I still can stick to the right order and reverse on 1 and 10. Doing that for 15 minutes is not so hard but I feel it misses the point somewhat. Another chatter-ish variant is to go;
1-I just did one and on the next inhale I’ll do two but not yet because I’m only on one. Yessir, one it is but here it comes. Airs almost out and then comes the next inhale and then it’s two. Here we go-2-Fine, that was two and…
That is also keeping track of breathing. That is also having your head filled with constant chatter.

I’ve done the others as well. For 20 minutes each. Now and then. Is there one exclusively on Patience?

Now you may ask “What is all this”?

“What is all this” is what’s popping up spontaneously if I don’t try to do anything. Not always and not solely, but often enough to make an impression. It’s like a koan of sorts. Maybe it is one of the basic koans?
What is all this?
I kinda like it like that.
What is all this?
When you start a practice and the first thing you do is to something that is not in any beginners guide to that practice, that should be a neon sign saying “Stop It”. Who am I to ignore every advice and instruction given in a tradition more than 4000 years old? How utterly and completely stupid is that? Making up a phony koan for yourself when you can’t even do basic breath counting properly? Take your Ritalin and go play computer games you fool. I can hear Gandalf on the last one; You Fool!

Well then, Q:What Is All This? A:This is the where your CCr-alert says – Go Sit!